Calling out what others know but don't count on you to say or do is a great way to build closeness. Declare and preempt what people are thinking. Play on those predictabilities to gain an advantage. It doesn't have to be self-deprecating, but you do have to be self-aware.
by amitp
And what does that mean? At a most basic level, it means trusting yourself to admit a mistake and moving on. It can also take the form of a comedian poking fun at themselves. Or, a TV show that breaks the 4th wall when a character addresses the absurdity of a situation that the home audience has noticed.
These are sometimes dubbed "intelligent moments" and some creative minds do it better than others (Joss Whedon is exceptional). While smarts are certainly involved, it has more to do observing your ambience and being brave enough to speak up. Then do something about the "invisible elephant". Sure, meta-jokes and nested references run the risk of abandoning casual viewers and being decried as fanservice, but that in itself — like a knife — is not a bad thing.
A knife can help you prepare food. In the wrong hands, it can maim, or kill. These are tools, and being self-aware also carries similar risks and rewards: if you're a marketer, you can choose to use your heightened awareness to manipulate others through scams, or you can instead show you're listening and responding to vulnerabilities. Sharing from your heart and personal experience, thus benefiting people.
See how you can take control of a situation and better others?
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