hearing is precious

Posted on: July 23, 2004
… and so are all your other senses, so they say. I hope you're taking care of yours! Right now, I'm concerned about my hearing. It's been two months (from about mid-May) ever since I noticed a mysterious set of problems start to happen in my ears. Hearing loss seems to be part of it — specifically, I have tinnitus time to time, a loud annoying whine in my ears — but come to think of it, that's been a part of me since I was a child. The new nuissance happens to be this loud crackling/popping noise that happens like a reflex whenever there's any loud, percussive noise in the high frequencies in my vicinity. Including from within me (i.e. when eating carrot sticks). It's really impaired me, like?someone's?beating on the inside of my brain where I can't get at it (Him? Her? An?auditory?gremlin?)?and I haven't been able to work on my music lately, and not only because of that: I've found I have?developed hyperacusis too, which is really getting on my nerves because my ears are sensitive and it gives me a real headache. Instead of hearing stuff in the higher registers too softly, it's all exaggerated and distorted to an annoying degree. More mid-day naps I guess, and I don't feel terribly productive because of it. One thing's for sure: I've been writing a lot more than I have in a LONG time.
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I'm on the waiting list for the specialist ENT doc, same one I reckon who checked on my Dad before he died (Dad had vertigo and all manner of pain — he had to crouch down, elbows stiff and jutted out to his knees, and his palms clasped around his ears while he tried to shake the disorienting agony away), and the operative term right now seems to be *waiting*. Well, gotta?have?faith in God. Thanks to everyone on the Internet and off the 'Net who's?been helping me with this and?helping me dig up rare technical terms like "stapedial myoclonus" and "spasm of the tensor tympani". I'm not sure that's?what it is?yet, but it sure sounds like what I've got. So it's ongoing, more than a bit scary because I don't know what's coming up around the bend, but life's an adventure and this is surely just another leg of the journey. Far braver souls than I have suffered worse things and gone on with much strength, so I gotta keep hanging in there (like that classic orange cat poster as seen on "The Simpsons").
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In the meantime, if you're reading this and like to listen to loud music: consider turning it down. I sure liked listening to loud music but I don't anymore. I don't even care much for talking loud at the present, although I do my darndest to keep up a cheerful disposition and don't let crap like this get me down. I don't think the origins of my relatively recent troubles are from pounding techno music all night long either, because of my controlled environment — but the specifics aren't relevant, because noise pollution is everywhere. I've only begun to notice how damn LOUD most restaurants are, and how much industrial noise there is in the world. Some of it can't be avoided without active hearing protection, so look into getting yourself a nice pair of custom-molded earplugs. Especially the kind that attentuate the noise specially with a type of filter and?do not blur the sounds, so everything is still crystal clear — just softer.?The initial investment may be steep (seems like Costco has them at a not-too-shabby deal), but can you afford to protect your lifelong?hearing??Absolutely. I'm looking into getting a set for myself. Sure I sound like an old fogey now — maybe I'm getting to be that way all too soon ;) — but like the sages will tell ya: you don't miss it until it's gone and gone it will be if you keep blasting away without ear protection.
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I didn't think I'd be making a blog entry like this today but in the midst of my headaches, I wanted to share this with you. Don't be a fool like I was when I was a kid either when it comes to your eyes. You know how I lost my eyesight? No kidding… some kiddos have funny obsessions: sniffing glue, grabbing puppy dog tails, and all manner of growing-up discovery. Me? I stared straight into the sun for hours at a time. Stupid, and now I regret it. Burned out my retinas. Maybe someday I'll get Lasik but I can't think of an equivalent for my ears apart from a hearing aid, and they still can be unwieldy. There's a lot of myths to be dispelled about those gadgets, by the way: hearing aids aren't just for the old. If you lose your hearing enough, no matter what your age, you're going to need one. And if you don't believe me and since this is a techno music blog, maybe you can listen to the words of Thomas Bangalter, of Daft Punk fame: "I?ve given up [DJing]?because I want to protect my ears, music is too loud in clubs." I don't think anyone knows better than him. The man is a time-tested and true craftsman with his production?partner?Guy-Manuel De Homem-Christo in the studio,?from the acidic pounding of international hit "Da Funk" to the unorthodoxly?brazen guitar solos of "Aerodynamic"… this is music meant to be played LOUD. Speaking of LOUD, look how?Timo Maas gets it right on his album cover (and?on a tangential wave, my fave track from that CD is "Help Me" with its spooky?cyber-theremins):
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See, can you hear?what can happen? Here's another great list of celebs who have tinnitus and other forms of hearing loss.?It's a Stephen Kingesque, Dean?Koontzian?horror in its own right: imagine, quite possibly 24/7, to have a loud buzzing or humming or warbling or other annoying, *constant* pulsating noise going back and forth in your ears, sometimes raising and splitting your skull wide open (like the "watermelon" scene from Scanners), other times lurking like a brooding horror in the background before coming forth to punish you viciously — and repeatedly — once more. Think of it?as getting a daily?ear caning, Singapore-style.?I'm living some of it now, and thank God I haven't fully descended into madness… yet! (I have to semi-jest on that one, haven't lost my sense of humor.)
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Going clubbing actively without hearing protection will hurt you so much in the end that you'll be depressed and cry lots (possibly), and feel sorry for yourself too.?No one will honestly relate to your pain except for others who are also in the same situation. You might be able to still feel the bass, but what good is that if you don't know what else is going on except for the rhythmic deep throbbing that keeps reminding you of what you cannot hear? The bass is a physical sensation, so while you're still good to go, you can pop in those earplugs I mentioned and the music should still be enjoyable to you.?Plus, you can still TOTALLY feel that powerful kick drum go BOOM-BOOM-BOOM-BOOM, but not?at levels that will make you experience the aural equivalent of puking over the porcelain throne after one too many Coronas the next day. Don't try to play the lame game of playing your music in the car louder than the next guy or girl over, even if you have a nice system. That's sonic suicide.
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I've got deaf relatives and friends, and they tell me to take care of my hearing. No more hearing = no more beautiful music to listen to. It's?losing part of you, that's what it is. And?like I said, your hearing is precious and I want you to take good care of it into the future to come so that you can enjoy listening to your grandchildren calling out to you and asking you to read them a story, and so you can also?grow into your golden years to go fishing or whatever it is you like to do outdoors — without the wonderful sounds of nature like birdsong and water being heard by your ears as… nothing, nothing at all. :*-(
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TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF, PROTECT YOUR?HEARING!
Got that? Make me a promise. Good.

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