Thanksgiving teachings from Torley

I wish you Happy Thanksgiving with the following 14 points which've served me well. I've thought about and done a lot with these over the last year, and they've cooled down, gelled for your digestion. I may not be sure of the soul's existence, but I do believe in the human spirit:

1. How you feel right now is best represented as a truth if you compare it to all the other life you've lived. If you take the average "score" of all of your days, where do you see them? Closer to the valleys at the bottom or peaks at the top? Don't let emotions cloud your whole timeline.
    
2. Inner peace only comes after acknowledging the outside world. They say art doesn't exist in a vacuum, and neither does feeling fulfilled. There's no shame in acknowledging the contributions of others to the totality of yourself. If anything, it makes you a greater person. Even the most adamant loner would rather be loved than hated.
    
3. Listening to uplifting music makes achievement a lot easier. I'm listening to a cinematic orchestral score while writing this, and I'm instantly reminded of many favorite film scenes where great things happen. Real life isn't just like the movies, but art shouldn't just imitate life — it should better it. Listen to music that really moves you, and you'll be moved to get things done!
    
4. Declare good things spontaneously. If you have something nice to say, do it as soon as it comes to mind, especially if it doesn't relate to the conversation at hand. The recipient of your blessings will likely be taken aback, and positively so. People love positive surprises! There are exceptions to this, of course, but in the many times where I've practiced this, it's never let me down.
    
5. Write down your ideas. Obviously basic, but I'm flabbergasted by how many don't take a few seconds to write down what could save them minutes, or hours in the future. A lot of people see me as ultra-productive, and a big reason why is because my mind hardly reaches a dead end where I think, "I'm bored. There's nothing to do." I have to-do lists, sketchbooks, audio recordings, and more. Sound overwhelming? It is, but the nice thing about documenting your ideas is your head doesn't have to worry about forgetting it — and whenever you reach a dead end, just reach into your bag o' ideas, and pull something delightful out.
    
6. "Experienced" just means, "I've done a lot of this before". Complementarily to the above, we make the assumption that old folks are wise because they've done a lot in their life. This isn't necessarily true, but being elderly certainly means you've spent a lot of time on this Earth, and had the opportunity to get a lot done. You don't need to be older to be experienced; passion will naturally adjust your gravity and focus to excel in your interests. This is, intriguingly enough, why it's so compelling to get paid for doing what you love.
    
7. If you do anything long enough, it becomes normal. Humans are generally adverse to change, and this is especially true for me: I almost compulsively pride myself on some routines. But I also find solace in creating "loops" I can break out of, then revisit. Whenever I find myself uncomfortable with change, I persist until I find myself later (never an "exact" time, but surely enough) looking back and marveling, "I can't believe I thought that was a big deal at the time." This is true of stressful life situations like the death of a loved one (my Dad died), moving house (which I've recently done), and… reinventing yourself.
    
8. Be yourself. Then be more than yourself. I've said this before, but if you want to keep developing who you are and doing proverbial "character-building", then you need to reinvent yourself. Repeatedly. Some of the "new you" may contradict the "old you", but that's alright. You can be all of the above, just at different times. And that's alright. (We didn't walk upright out of our Mommies, either.) Keep experimenting, and growing at a comfortable pace. Most of the really unhappy people I meet compartmentalize parts of themselves and overtly wear different masks around different people in their lives, and they, and their loved ones suffer for it.
    
9. Be more of an AND person than an OR person. Another of my fave maxims, this means, "When presented with more than a single choice, opt for multiples." I've heard more than one sage person also refer to this as "checkboxes instead of radio buttons". Why limit yourself to a few flavors of ice cream? Why not learn how to use PCs, Mac, Linux, AND more? Naturally, there are times when only one choice is appropriate — like which road to drive your car down (or for some, who you marry). But that shouldn't stop you from considering the "What ifs" of taking other routes. Most possibilities aren't exclusive.
    
10. Get bored of anger. I sometimes muse that I'll make a flowchart of my emotional process. People wonder, "Do you ever get angry, Torley?" Of course I do. But then after feeling that way for awhile, I get restless and eager to feel other emotions, and from them, do great things. My anger isn't a fulcrum for blowing up, it's an ambition-enabler, and consequently, action. Many popular favorites that I've created, from my Guide to High-Quality Photography to Torley Textures to video tutorials, have come out of me being angry that someone else didn't do it as I envisioned, so I went ahead and did it myself. If I were to be even more succinct, ANGER IS A DOORWAY TO HAPPINESS!
     
11. Life always looks easier in the rear-view mirror. Whenever I think a blog post I make is going to get a lot of attention, it doesn't. Whenever I think something I do pretty benign, that gets the heat. Even the most stressful events seem pretty tranquil after they've passed. Perhaps they've even become suitable to joke about. Don't think too little about what you're doing now, but don't think too much about it either. Heck, sometimes, don't think. Chances are you've already put enough thought into something if you've been motivated to act on it.
     
12. You can't do anything with what you don't have. Resourcefulness is key to my success. I liken it to this: when you take a picture, you can always crop out what you don't like, but adding in the missing details afterwards ain't easy. Likewise, if you compose 100 songs, you can always compile the best for an album, but… yup, you can't do anything with what you don't have.
     
13. Multi-purpose your actions. What you do should serve more than one purpose, as often as possible. It's efficient and fun! For example, one of my fave reasons for hand-making gifts is because not only will the recipient be delighted at receiving something so unique and hopefully awesome, I will have also learned and/or developed skills in the process.
     
14. "What would you rather be doing right now?" Do it.
     
    If you find yourself midway through a movie that sucks, turn off the TV and Google for spoilers. That'll free you up for more enjoyable tasks. Are you in a theatre? Money can be replaced but time can't, so you might as well walk out now.

    If you find yourself typing out a verbose, multi-paragraph on some Internet forum in a humiliatingly shameful way that doesn't contribute to your quality of life, *stop* mid-sentence, raise your hands while shouting out loud — "SCROO THIS!" — and do something that you won't regret.
     
    In just about every case, if you can't come up with a better idea, think about someone you'd love to spend time with, and do it. Even if you can't be there physically, send them an email, voice chat 'em, or even use a webcam.
     
    For you see… if every potentially wasted moment of your life was instead invested in being good to those you care about, your "account in the Universal Bank of Happiness" would be very well-funded.
      
    And you'd have even more thanks to give AND receive.

Tagged as: Better Lives, General