The Happiest Rage of All

Posted on: May 16, 2006

I'm here to tell you about the Happiest Rage of All. No, this isn't a product review… it's "just" unfettered, unbridled emotion. I must be in a good mood because I tasted watermelon slices today! Besides this, I recently purchased a full copy of ArtRage 2. Worth every fraction of a penny AND THEN SOME OMG OMG OMG IT ROX! It cost like US$20 and I can sleep better at night knowing I have unlimited use of the glitter.

I've been using ArtRage 2 to express myself artistically, like abstract scrawlings and sad bunnies whose wives have recently passed away because of breast cancer. Not only is ArtRage 2 impressive, it's one of those rare gems of software that creates an impression, like a kittycat with zebra stripes. You're like "WTH!?!?" and then that gives way—in a few seconds or so—to "YOU'RE SO BEAUTIFUL!" No, no, no… that isn't the end of it either. After that, you go, "WE'RE SO BEAUTIFUL!!!!" Because that's what great tools do: they enable you to bring out the signs and wonders to the world you had inside you all along. They blossom mindflowers and extrapolate the complicated equations of meta-kickass, and willingly force you to bend spacetime like buns bend around hot dogs, and you're absolutely left… breathless.

ArtRage 2 is a thoughtful program. If part of your canvas is occluded by a tool palette and you start drawing over it, the palette automagically disappears until you complete your stroke. There are many gorgeous touches in the interface, and it's really quite Jonathan Ive at times (no, that isn't cockney rhyming slang). Apparently the dudes at Ambient Design who made it—they're a small and dedicated team—live in a forest. I think that's rich, because I do too. I can relate!

The simulations are really flavorful. Something which even the pricey Corel Painter doesn't have a fuzzy fist wrapped around when it comes to scraping wet layers of paint. I really like the watermelon, er, watercolor (what am I thinking?) emulation in Painter—and I'm hoping inside that ArtRage 3 will have it—but there are so many distractions that get in my way of JMA = Just Making Art. Too many buttons and sliders and whatnot… so confuzzling! ArtRage 2 pares things down to what you'll really use.

I made this in 10 minutes using every single one of ArtRage 2's tools.

No postprocessing has been applied.

I remember when "natural media graphics program" was more of a buzzword. Laughable now, but I get this odd feeling ArtRage 2 is not as much as a discovered gem as it very well could be. I think that's part of why I'm writing this, because I have a compulsion with finding treasures that haven't been brought into the light enough—they're like anti-vampires, really, because when you expose them to the sun, they burst into rainbows and sunshine and bicorns o my!

ArtRage 2 is creamy like the best coffee (to me). When I use the paintbrushes and mix colors, I feel like I'm transported back to 1990 and watching one of those amazing dudes on TV show how he mixes colors in his palette. You can even do that process here: mix little hybrids off to the side and use the eyedropper (it's a much prettier eyedropper!) to bring the tones over. And then, like a well-choreographed aria with 40 hippos ballerina'ing in unison, you can do heavy hitting with grace.

Someday, I want to make a third batch of textures after the first and second mostly using ArtRage. I previously used the free version—YES IT'S GOOD TO BE TRUE!—and just wanted more.

Here's what I wish: more Residents of Second Life hearing about ArtRage 2, snagging the gratis download, making their own packs of textures, and propagating them inworld, sharing the art around for all! Not enough textures I see have a style recognizable and traceable to an individual creator. Great artists are often associated with the medium they work with. It'd be ULTRA to see more of this… and we are sadly lacking in original texture content creators.

However, I know even with me wishing out loud, such fantasies-come-true will continue to be rare gems, like kittycats with zebra stripes.

And that's precisely why I look out for jewels like ArtRage 2.