If I have one piece of advice to share today, only because I've lived and learned it and have lots of living to do,
PLEASE GROW YOUR PERSONALITY.
For a long time I tried to figure out what I was doing in this world, and I was rather cautious of reaching out. But I think (I don't know yet — how can anyone until they're in those final moments?) my life's mission is to encourage creativity in this world. What I call "AMPLIFYING YOUR AWESOME". To make things. Cool things. Damn fine things. Made by people who care — like you! — who don't let a soul-sucking job crush their spirit — or better yet, find a job which supports your gift to enrich others.
I keep seeing this, every piece of evidence I've gathered reaffirms it: many people think in their heads, rather self-consciously I might add, that they need to impress the world with something grand in order to make their mark. That may be true, but not in the way they think. You can have a TREMENDOUS impact simply sharing what's in your head that other people speak openly of, and right now I'm feeling SO INTENSE that I'm thinking I should make a videoblog on this… but for now, I'll continue clacking on these keys.
I HAVE SPEECH IMPEDIMENTS.
No, I'm not a stutterer as James Earl Jones (Darth Vader) is, but I've had a tough time pronouncing certain things that most people seem to do effortlessly, like "three" (me: "tree!"), "government" (me: "gawverment!"), and "virtual world" (guess). I was laughed at for this (well, at least those first two words) as a kid, and it stung. But it was never enough to stop my lifelong dream to share my voice with the many people out there such as yourself I've never met face-to-face, but through the Internet, through Second Life and YouTube and Twitter and so many other tools, I've been blessed.
MY WIFE SAYS I CHEW LOUDLY.
It ANNOYS her like CRAZY. I try to eat quietly, but it's HARD. Maybe something about my mouth makes me mispronounce stuff and eat with great vigor, and I try to be polite. But more importantly is the STRENGTH we can derive from VULNERABILITY: once you've been the first to share a weakness, the power is yours to dictate. Go ahead. Others can laugh at you, but only because you allowed them, you shared with them. You have THIS power. And in time, maybe they will be less COWARDLY of their own foibles, so that they too, may share with you.
These are REVEALING moments in our lives. Not just one great epic slam-bang, but every single day, essential truths like this can be gleaned and applied.
When I was but a tot, my hair began to go very coarse and wavy. My Dad laughed (not in a cruel way), telling me of a rural myth he once heard: that curly-haired Chinamen cause trouble! (I'm not entirely Chinese, but yes, it's in my roots.) I felt very disassociated with myself for awhile because I just wanted to look like everyone else. But then I realized THEY wanted to look like "everyone else" too, and were just hiding their quirks!
LESSON: we'd all be a lot more unique if we could trust each other.
I know the state of the world is regrettable, with so much conflict because of "differences". (People don't seem to fight so much when they're "alike", unless it's 2 catty divas who wear the same dress on the red carpet.) But I also know how much untapped potential there is for HUMAN CREATIVITY, to make GREAT THINGS HAPPEN.
Don't rely on others. Count on yourself. If each of us did this in ample amounts, we'd be more self-sufficient and have the courage to help our fellow humans. The ULTIMATE STUPIDITY is saying "It's not about you, it's about them."
NO!!!! IT'S ABOUT US.
Prepare to be challenged. Prepare to be contested by those who don't "get" you (at least not yet), by those who don't believe in your GENIUS VISION. But if it's truely great, and I hope it is, then YOU MUST PERSIST. You must adapt, you must suffer the consequences and reap the rewards of your decisions.
Don't settle for a second-hand life sitting in the back row of the audience audience when YOU WANT TO BE THE ROCK STAR. You can do both, you can admire from afar and be a part of GREAT THINGS.
Be an AND person. Not an OR person.
This isn't a pep talk. It's just how things are, and how they should be.
(And I was momentarily distracted by a stray cat coming to our front door, so I'll have to continue this later. I WILL, I promise!)
{ 5 comments… read them below or add one }
No truer words Torley have been spoken. Just do it, blow your own artistic imaginative-fantastical inspired horns, open your mind, follow your heart, never give up, never give in to the so called norm & you won't ever be disappointed!
Too many times, I find that people can put you down if what you create doesn't make you money. I create on many avenues and non of those make me any money because I'm not one to compromise my artistic integrity for commercial reasons. In truth, I'm not very good at making money, but I'm told I'm good at making music, podcasts, writing and creating musical statues in Second Life. I just sometimes wish the people close to me would appreciate what I'm doing instead of far away on-line friends I would probably never meet on real life. You are very lucky to be surrounded by people who understand what you do and appreciate it. Never take that for granted.
You know I long ago shed most of my SL social inhibitions. That's not to say I am raving ogre, raping and destroying. I let myself go completely and was kind of pleasantly surprised.
@Trella: HEAR HERE! Or however that's spelled.
@Bluesmoke: I don't think I'm well-understood enough. Still working on that and documenting my progress.
I've also run into people who devalued my achievements when they weren't/aren't making money. But then again, that speaks to THEIR values. If you REALLY are happy, then all is right with you.
And what's stopping you from possibilities opening up where you do meet people who understand you?
@kanomi: I'm with you there. I hope your pleasant surprisedness has inspired others to free themselves from the social-construct shackles of "the real world", too.
Man, this is a totally awesome blog entry.
I get teased when I say the word "wash", like as in "I've got to wash laundry" because it always has an "r" in it when it comes out. "Warsh" hehe I have trouble saying the word "drawer" too.
I love that a stray cat gets attention <3 mewmew. Hope you petted him!
My husband chews loudly, it is so gross! I glare at him till he closes his mouth and he tries hard too to not be so gross about it, but still.. sometimes.. I can hear him in the other room. Gross hehe!! I can't handle those Hardees commercials where they zoom in on people chewing, it's enough to make me hurl.